Jesus is proud of me, honors me and sings over me. It doesn’t matter what the world says of me- I am not ruled by the world anymore-I am His. This is a balm to me because my approval idol can be an insidious beast inside me waiting to pounce when I am weak.

When I am weak and suffering and look to the approval idol and let the beast in-oh my he begins to eat me alive as he whispers lies into my head..”You are a failure, an idiot, why did you say what you said-do what you did? Now they are going to think this and that about you-criticize you to others”..Then worry, anxiety and fear creep in. The beast wants me to take my eyes off of Jesus in that moment and I am in danger of that downward spiral when I do.. Yet when I fix my eyes on Jesus and remember the truth-remember that I am lovely to God because He gave up his beauty so I can be..When I suffer or fear someone is criticizing me or judging me, if I look at Him, my beauty, strength and glory is enhanced-I am walking in the same path as Him-a path into maturity, greatness, wisdom and sympathy toward others, communion with God and royalty..

I wasn’t looking to Him recently at work-They are down two people so they put me on dishes-four hours a day every day-scrubbing burnt on stuff off of large steel pans-hurrying to get it done in time. Also having to put them away. I have swollen knuckles, cuts on my fingers that are easily infected, and my body is hurting by the end of the day. I have worked in kitchens and worked hard doing dishes but most times they rotate people, and when you do dishes you have people who help dry and scrub. Anyway, I am fearful about telling my boss-I don’t want to come across like a wimp. So this is the beast inside and I am now aware and am turning-fixing my eyes on Him. I am going to talk with my boss about it Monday and I am going to be truthful and I can be because I am lovely to Jesus-He is proud of me regardless of what my boss and co-workers think. He will give me His mercy and compassion toward my boss and all she has on her plate being two people short.

I have noticed my boss has been coming to me with her problems at home. She has a lot on her plate and tells me she is distracted at work because of it. One day I walked into work after having a rough evening and morning at home with the boys and she greeted me and asked did you have a good night. I told her -well, it was rough with my oldest son, and I didn’t get much sleep but I prayed and God brought me such comfort.” That was it..she smiled, stared at me a while and didn’t say anything and went back to work.

I am waiting on God to open doors there at work so I can share the Gospel but since being on the blog and listening to Keller I am learning that it is the overflow of being with Him-He flows out of me..He is my life and since He is my life they will see His love in me. Satan wants my co workers to remain in His grip and He wants to bring me down to accomplish His purpose..I find he ramps his attacks up..Yet the battle is the Lord’s and he has already won, SO I need to choose to listen to Jesus and knead the Gospel deeper into my soul..Jesus is my life-my identity-He is risen-Death no longer has power over me-and He takes me outside myself and gives me compassion and love for those who don’t know Him-who are bound by lies, lost, and without hope.

Sorry-babbled a lot but this is where He has me now..Yet, I have to say I need so so so to speak truth to my soul and to repent and turn when I embrace these lies..I see more and more how I need Him-every hour I need Him..how He is my strength in my weakness-and I am becoming more weak it seems which is so good-my pride is being broken slowly..oh how I need Him…

Loved it all. Jesus is our King, Captain, Brother. Loved the picture of the battlefield. The Captain looks over and sees you running for your life, your foe is much bigger, stronger, and faster than you. He comes and puts himself between you and your enemy.
Jesus has heard our screams and came down. (What a contrast to the horrific description of the murder of Kitty Genovese in NY, where 38 people looked on but no one helped)

Jesus is our Brother who is proud of us. “You are not ruled by what they say anymore – He is not ashamed of you!”

Am I afraid of the future? My Captain has secured my future, it’s waiting for me.

God does not “boom” answers to us from heaven, He came down.

1. I love Keller’s contrast of the greek gods compared to Jesus-He isn’t Olympus who sits on a throne distant from us enjoying his position and only looks down when he is bored-He is a King who gets involved, who came down, became human and died for us.

2. I loved how he pointed out that deep down everyone fears death, yet we amass wealth, step on others to get ahead and live it up for today could be our last-yet what is the point since we are going to die anyway-what would all that we did on Earth matter-why does it matter to live anyway if the fact is all of us are going to die-and that is it, no God, no eternity? Death is a foe and is Satan’s weapon, but we have a captain, a champion who got in the middle of us and our foe and suffered death and rose so that he could destroy the power of death.

3. This is what stood out to me, mainly because of my approval idol, so I will post my notes. It is too good to miss anything:

“Back then when you wanted to recommend yourself you gave them a geneology. You would leave off the family members you were ashamed of and put on top the ones you were proud of.

How stunning it is in Matthew 1 how they recommended Jesus to the people In that time-the geneology is there and you have women in there and women were of low status..the women are: Tamar-incest surviror, Bathsheba-adultress, rahab prostitute, mary unwed single mother. By moral standards these are people we should be ashamed of, but jesus proudly gives them a place of honor in the geneology of the King of the universe. This double negative is the cosmic positive. It doesn’t matter what you have ever done because through the death of Jesus you can be part of his family, someone who sings over you, who he is proud of. It doesn’t matter what the world says-you are not ruled by the world anymore. We have a brother who is proud of us.

People have fear and discouragement because of things that are happening in their lives. What are you afraid of if this is true?

4. You can get rid of all fear of the future-Jesus has gone into the future for you and has secured the future-a future is a world under our feet-the way it is supposed to be. He has gone there, secured it and is waiting for me.

Afraid of the past-In Jesus Christ it is over-your past is over-don’t be afraid.

Discouragement of your troubles- Suffering-The help you give people in their troubles won’t mean anything unless you are there by their side. We have the only religion that says God doesn’t boom the answers to our suffering. We have a God who came down, who was rejected, experienced imprisonment, torture, and being cut off from God-he is there with us..He is with us. He is a faithful, merciful high priest.”

And this:

“The truest ultimate beauty is the one who gave up his beauty so that we can be lovely to God. The truest ultimate strength is the one who was strong enough to be weak and vulnerable so we could come to God. The greatest glory is the one who gave up his glory so that we can have God; and just as Jesus glory, beauty and strength is enhanced by having lost it so that when you suffer and are looking at him you are walking in the same path-a path into maturity, greatness, wisdom, sympathy toward other people, communion with God and into royalty.”